The real cause of social anxiety and the cure


#1

Anxiety is a result of excessive activity in the subconscious. People give too much attention to life situations, and they do not address their mind and body, letting tension build up.

To reliably reduce one’s level of anxiety is extremely simple. Just stop trying to do anything. Observe what thoughts and feelings are popping up.

With each thought or feeling that comes up, you become a little less tense inside. You become a little less anxious as a person. There is simply no alternative, what is buried inside must come out in order for you to get better.

Relaxed awareness is the default, healthy state of being. All thoughts that aren’t consciously created are pain in disguise. That is why you do not get thoughts that have no emotional importance to you.

Desire promises you an escape from pain, but wanting anything is just further pain. Having friends and being successful in life will not provide lasting happiness. They are outside of yourself, and happiness is on the inside.

Fulfillment is a choice that you can make at every moment, by choosing to relax and observe the miracle of existence, or by chasing a mirage.


#2

These platitudes are all rather fine and simple, and simplistic. Sure, we might agree. But, where does the person with severe anxiety go from here? What solutions does one get from this? What does such a person with this severe condition do then? “Just stop trying to do anything? Just be mindful? Just stay in a state of relaxed awareness?” I can’t argue that I agree with the intent, and that, in some ways, I am in more of a place where I can put into place this type of thinking and these type of strategies - not resisting, being aware but not judgmental, being less tense. Yes, I can do that now. I could not have gotten here without a structured path to allow me to get here. I didn’t take the trek up the mountain to stay there for years to get there. Instead I used a structured step by step therapy to allow me to build these skills in a way that I could realize life without anxiety, which includes parts of what you say.

I will have a stronger opinion here that can make for argument or tension in this thread. My intent is not to argue, but only to voice my opinion. Feel free to disagree… “The real cause and the real cure” - no. The real cause of my social anxiety was not simply excessive activity. It’s also not the real cause for everyone I see here in the therapy groups. First, I don’t need to dive deep into this discussion of the real cause. It does me no real good to dwell on this topic, it does not lead to solutions. But I know the cause of my social anxiety, and I would not describe it as you do. It does a disservice to those looking to get help, to serious cases of social anxiety who are looking for solutions, not such platitudes. And you’ve given no real cure that most people can put into use to get to the place you describe. These kind of statements help no one. But, they sound great on cards or other self-help books.


#3

Where does the person with severe anxiety go from here?

Being aware is the cornerstone of any successful person. These aren’t just platitudes they are the very foundation on which emotionally healthy secure people stand.

What solutions does one get from this?

I agree ‘To reliably reduce one’s level of anxiety is extremely simple, just stop doing anything,’ this is a false statement. It takes years to reduce one’s level of anxiety. of course a dead person has no anxiety and simply reducing ones anxiety shouldn’t be the overiding goal of therapy. Taking meaningful action should be. But if we look at the context of the mind, and day to day social interactions, not doing anything, as in not reacting to the thoughts but just observing them is the way to go. It allows you to focus on your body and from there you can foster your intention whilst remaing in the present moment.

What does a person with this severe condition do then?

Maybe take a meditation bootcamp, take a yoga course, do mindfullness exercises there are many ways to learn to observe ones thoughts and become aware of the present moment.

Just stop doing anything? Just be mindful? just stay in a state of relaxed awareness?

Dont dismiss these things they are vital in learning to be more effective in the world for the socially anxious and really for anyone.

You sound like you have a strong opinion on the cause of social anxiety although you say it does no good to dwell on the topic i get the feeling you still carry insecurites around this, as do I there is nothing wrong woth having insecurities everyone has them. but ask yourself the question ‘is it effective going forward for me to have these beliefs’ as I suspect probably not in which case explore the beliefs. Ironically the best way to explore them is to observe them using mindfullness which you’ve dismissed as ‘no real cure’ when in fact its the cure you need.